Forum:Favorite party bander

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One of the best things in the series are party banders. What are your favorite ones? My favorite is between Oghren and Anders, nemely this one.

Anders: You don't actually think your jokes are funny, do you?
Oghren: Could have sworn that fly was buzzing again.
Anders: "HAR! Let me tell you about my life in one word!" (Belches)
Oghren: "Oh no! Don't take me back to the tower! I'm far, far too delicate!"
Anders: "I'm not only a dwarf, I'm a moron! Listen to me fart!"
Oghren: "Oh no, big templar man! What are you going to do with that sword?"
Anders: Eww.
Oghren: Don't play with fire unless you want to get burned, son.

It's so funny. Another party bander I like is one between Varric and Sebastian.

Sebastian: You know, if you have time, I could give you a few archery pointers.
Varric: Excuse me?
Sebastian: Sometimes your shots veer a little left, I thought maybe your cocking ring was off.
Sebastian: I could take a look if you like.
Varric: You want to touch Bianca's cocking ring?
Sebastian: It was just a thought.

I like this underdeveloped concept of their rivalry. The dwarf is also funny, when irritaited by the Choir boy. Just imagine their competition in archery or a duel by arrows.78.9.146.102

Morrigan: "You are very quiet Sten."
Sten: "Only compared to some."

----Isolationistmagi 20:15, October 9, 2012 (UTC)

Isabela: Would you tell your uncle to leave me alone? He's often... inappropriate.
Hawke: You find something inappropriate?
Isabela: Extremely so! It's... rather repulsive, actually. Please talk to him.
Hawke: But it's more entertaining if I don't.
Isabela: Hawke!
Hawke: You have pretty eyes.
Isabela: Oh, you're impossible!

Anders: Is that supposed to be Andraste's face on your crotch?
Sebastian: What?
Anders: That... belt buckle thing. Is that Andraste?
Sebastian: My father had this armor commissioned when I took my vows as a brother.
Anders: I'm just not sure I'd want the Maker seeing me shove His bride's head between my legs every morning.

Hawke: When you tell people about our escape from Lothering, why do you make it seem like I have food all over my face?
Varric: You're larger than life, Hawke. I had to give you a few flaws just to make you approachable.
Hawke: Did you call me fat?
Varric: Yes, that's pretty much how I tell it. "Hawke rolled into the fray like a gigantic pudding, covered in gravy." It's more dramatic that way.
Hawke: I hope the story ends, "And then Hawke backhanded the mouthy dwarf."
Varric: Everyone's a critic.

And lastly for now.

Bethany: Uncle Gamlen's been sneaking into my room, he thinks I don't notice, but he's not exactly a master criminal.
Hawke: Uh? Does that mean I should stop doing that too?
Bethany: Gross!

Tommyspa (talk) 07:19, October 10, 2012 (UTC)

Mabari one of my favorites

Morrigan: You ate my entire bag of herbs, you foolish dog. Do not think I am unaware of where it went.

Dog: (Unhappy whine!)

Morrigan: 'Tis your own fault for being so entirely gluttonous. Several of those herbs were poisonous. You should be pleased they did not kill you.

Dog: (Conversational Barking)

Morrigan: Do not be ridiculous. I am certainly not going to give you more, even if I did have more to give.

Dog: (Whine!)

Morrigan: Ugh. You have some nerve, creature. And your breath leaves much to be desired. Off you go.

Dog: (Whine!)

Morrigan: We shall see. I promise nothing.

Also

Shale: I am watching you, dog. Do you know how many of your kind urinated on me in that village? And all I could is stand there and watch, helpless. If I see one of those legs of yours lift so much as an inch in my direction -- pow!

Dog: (Confused whine!)

Shale: I am glad we have this understanding. At least your kind can be reasoned with... unlike those damned feathered fiends!

__

Morrigan: So are you going to continue staring at me as if I am covered in eels?
Sten: Eels would be something.
Morrigan: Prudery! How charming. I expected paranoia. This is much better. I prefer to be stared at lustfully, if at all.
Sten: Keep trying, then.
Morrigan: Oh? Then shall I demonstrate an act or two? And you may tell me hot or cold?
Sten: I'll save time. Cold.
Morrigan: (Chuckles) You are a tease.

Morrigan: So have you changed your mind, Sten? I dream about you and I, if you must know.
Sten: You would, even were I interested in a small thing like you. The Qunari act is... unpleasant.
Morrigan: Unpleasant? Unpleasant how? Now I really am interested.
Sten: Deadly.
Morrigan: And what if I didn't mind? I enjoy a little... animation.
Sten: You'd be less animated afterward.
Morrigan: It sounds as if I am arousing your passions already, my dear Sten.
Sten: Parshaara. Why do you pester me?
Morrigan: (Chuckles) Because 'tis amusing, that is why.

Morrigan: You seem so deep in thought, my dear Sten. Thinking of me, perhaps? The two of us, together at last?
Sten: Yes.
Morrigan: I... what did you say?
Sten: You will need armor, I think. And a helmet. And something to bite down on. How strong are human teeth?
Morrigan: How strong are my teeth?
Sten: Qunari teeth can bite through leather, wood, even metal given time. Which reminds me, I may try to nuzzle.
Morrigan: Nuzzle?
Sten: If that happens, you'll need an iron pry bar. Heat it in a fire, first, or it may not get my attention.
Morrigan: Perhaps it would be better if we did not proceed.
Sten: Are you certain? If it will satisfy your curiosity...
Morrigan: Yes. Yes, I think it is best.

Alistair: So this... "bird thing" of yours.
Shale: I do not have a "bird thing." I have an extremely justified rage of the flying vermin that plague this world.
Alistair: But there are some birds that are useful. Like the ones you eat!
Shale: I approve of the ritual slaying of the foul beasts, but--it eats one? Disgusting.
Alistair: They're really quite tasty. you just need to rip off the feathers, first. I like the skin, myself.
Shale: I... think I am going to be sick...
Alistair: Ooh! Golem vomit! This I have to see!

--Vampire Damian (talk) 11:40, October 10, 2012 (UTC)

Some of them are actually quite humorous. Such as...

Zevran: Might I offer you a bit of advice, my good friend Alistair?
Alistair: I like my hair the way it is, thank you.
Zevran: Truly? As you wish... though my advice is regarding something else completely. It has to do with your recent... exertions with your fellow Grey Warden that I overheard.
Alistair: My...? Oh.
Zevran: It did seem as if you just got going when all grew quiet. You are... feeling all right, yes? Perhaps you are tired?
Alistair: We aren't talking about this, are we? Did I hit my head?
Zevran: I have some roots from home that you may chew if you need energy. As for volume, perhaps you ought to try arching your--
Alistair: Whoa! Whoa! Awkward!
Zevran: You Fereldens are so finicky. How will you ever learn how to pleasure each other unless you talk about it?
Alistair: Not listening! La la la la la!

Or...

Zevran: Has anyone told you what marvellous eyes you possess, my dear?
Morrigan: Again with the flattery? Do you not tire from these pointless exercises?
Zevran: In Antiva, women are accustomed to being showered with the praise they deserve. Men should worship you at your feet as you pass.
Morrigan: They don't find that incredibly annoying?
Zevran: They are goddesses receiving their subjects, just as you should be. Whatever would be annoying about that?
Morrigan: I have no wish to be placed upon a pedestal.
Zevran: But you deserve no less. You should be admired by painters, copied by sculptors, exalted by poets! Surely you know that yours is a beauty so exotic it--it would turn the eye of the Maker Himself!
Morrigan: Well, I suppose I...
Alistair: By the Maker! You were right! You win.
Zevran: I think you owe me five silvers, yes?
Morrigan: I hate you all.

Shale: I have noticed that the painted elf seeks the attention of the Grey Warden.
Zevran: He certainly does.
Shale: (Snorts) I watched many such couplings during the time I spent immobile in Honnleath. Or should I say I was forced to watch. You do know that this usually ends in reproduction. I have seen it many times, indeed.
Zevran: Oh? That is not such a terrible thought. Creating a new life can be a great deal of fun.
Shale: So you say. I have no idea how a golem is created, but I doubt I shall be creating one anytime soon.
Zevran: Just as well, I imagine. Any lover of yours would no doubt be quickly reduced to a puddle of bruises.
Shale: So you see me winning the affection of another golem, do you? Most golems are slaves to whomever holds their control rod.
Zevran: Funny, it works exactly the same way for us as well.

Sebastian: I-- Hawke! We were just talking about you.
Hawke: Carry on. I love to eavesdrop.
Varric: "Hawke said sarcastically."
Hawke: You know I hate it when you do that.
Varric: "Hawke muttered in an angry aside to the dwarf..."

And my favourite...

Merrill: (Giggles)
Fenris: What? Why are you looking at me like that?
Merrill: You're in love!
Fenris: I am not.
Merrill: Everytime she looks away, you stare at Hawke with those sad puppy eyes.
Fenris: There are no puppy eyes.
Merrill: It's all right, you know. Even you can be happy once in a while. It won't kill you. But your face might crack if you smile, so be careful.

Elves love trolling. - 23:40, October 10, 2012 (UTC)

These have to be my favourites, and a reason why you don't piss Velanna off.

Velanna: Why do your people revere the stone so much?
Oghren: It's because we come from the Stone. When we come out of our mothers, we're small, round rocks. Pink-streaked rocks are girls, and gray ones are boys. The rocks must be dipped in lava for a few moments each day to keep warm. Every year, a few unlucky parents drop the rock into the lava and can't get it out. Very sad. But do it right, and in a few weeks, the rock cracks open, revealing a bouncing dwarven baby.
Velanna: Like... an egg? That can't be right.
Oghren: Are you questioning dwarven nature and tradition? I'm insulted. (grunts)

Velanna: Sigrun, is it true that dwarves are born as rocks?
Sigrun: "Born as rocks?"
Velanna: I knew it! That slimy, foul-breathed toadstool! "Pink rocks are girls, gray ones are boys." Ugh, and I almost believed him!
Sigrun: Who? Oghren? You believed Oghren?

Oghren: (Groans) Don't say anything. Every noise feels like a rusty nail shoved in my forehead.
Velanna: Had a bit too much fun last night? I can help. I had clanmates as bad as you. They used this root as a remedy, powdered and mixed with water. Here.
Oghren: Thanks.

Oghren (in MS Sam voice): What's wrong with you, woman? What was that thing you gave me?
Velanna: Just a little something to caution you against telling me more tales about baby rocks.
Oghren: I just told you a harmless lie, but you... you... When does the swelling go down? It's throbbing!
Velanna: (Laughs)

This one sounds funny in 4th line.

Fenris: You speak of disliking the Deep Roads a great deal. Why?
Anders: Besides the obvious, you mean?
Fenris: It's a dangerous place, but less so for a Grey Warden.
Anders: Darkspawn this, darkspawn that. Taint taint taint taint taint.
Anders: After a while, you just get so tired of it, you know?
Fenris: I... do now.

-unsigned poster

Dragon_Age_2_-_Apostitutes — Dragon Age 2 - Apostitutes

Apostitutes!

Isabella: Apostate Prostitutes? Apostitutes! *giggles*

I now kill Idunna every time and make sure Isabella is in the party, just so I get this very line. Hitokiri Akins (talk) 19:00, October 19, 2012 (UTC)

COrrection, it's Idunna, Viveka is her supervisor in BLooming Rose. -unsigned poster

Okay, I fixed it. Although, tip for you; please sign your posts. You can do so by utilizing four tildes after your post. If you don't know what a tilde is, it's the upperleft most key on the keyboard. Hitokiri Akins (talk) 23:34, October 19, 2012 (UTC)

The location od the tilde depends on what kind of keyboard configuration you're using. I use a Finnish one and the tilde is on the right side of it next to the enter key. -- Gissur the Sailor (talk) 10:48, October 20, 2012 (UTC)

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My favorites have to be the dirty ones, and the ones where they are trolling Anders. I bought the DLC's just after reading two of the conversation bits (worth every penny)

Isabela (at the barracks): Coming here feels wrong, like diddling a sister...
Bethany: Why?! Why do you say these things?

Merrill: Have I ever mentioned I like your coat?
Anders: You do?
Merrill: It's very lively! Like a crow in the middle of anting!
Anders: That's.... that's great. Thanks, Merrill.

Anders: Do the Dalish ever have fancy parties? I always imagined they celebrated most big occasions by eating mushrooms and acorns. And maybe dancing naked around a campfire.
Merrill: You know, I was wondering when the naked dancing was going to start. And the human sacrifice. I mean, you just can't throw a decent party without kidnapping a human child and offering her entrails to the sky gods.
Anders: Really?
Merrill: No.

Anders: I'm not going to turn into a raging abomination every time someone commits a fashion faux-pas.
Sebastian: I meant not taking advantage of a captive audience to proselytize about the fate of mages. But the other thing is good, too.

Anders: You didn't hear him admiring mine all night. And saying that he's always wanted a hat made of human ears. And calling a hatter.
Varric: Look on the bright side, losing your ear will add to your torture look. Some women really like that.

This one caught me by surprise, and was hilarious (the VOs make cattiness fun to listen to...)

Hawke: Because I always like to follow the advice of tainted crazy people.
Fenris: Never stopped you before...
Anders: Excuse me?
Fenris: Nevermind.

@ Tommyspa, the sarcastic response is the best (imo)

Varric: Yes, that's pretty much how I tell it. "Hawke rolled into the fray like a gigantic pudding, covered in gravy." It's more dramatic that way. Hawke: Does it have to be gravy? Couldn't it be chocolate? Varric: Everyone's a critic.

I play a lady, and this makes it meta funny as well.

Palipride47 (talk) 00:49, October 20, 2012 (UTC)